Evil!Party: Test-Driving Our New Artifact

I think I'd planned to proofread this before it went up this morning. However... it's Tuesday, I feel like I've been run over by a bicycle (if not a truck), and... Yeah. Ha. This is what I've got. 

We're taking it for granted that we actually have all the keys at this point; now we should be able to rearrange the maze so that the Apparatus of Kwalish can reach the exit. Of course, I've probably worked out the wrong exit... {NARRATOR VOICE: He had, in fact, worked out the wrong exit.}

Still, we start turning keys and shifting chunks of maze around until we have a direct bridge from our prize to the northeast exit.

This thing is full of interesting devices.

There are three dispensers:
Provide elixir of swimming 6x/day
Potion of water breathing 2x/day
Yummy Black sludge: Iron Body 1/week

There's also a teeny little manufactory for a temporary raft.

There are two helms of Underwater Action, one on each seat. Attacking with the claws uses attack bonus + dex; it needs to be facing the thing it attacks.

Bob the Frost Giant skeleton won't fit; we break him into bones and put him away in the bag of holding; Durest will have to bring him back later.

Durest starts trying to drive, with more success than you might expect. Jenny takes the weapons & utility seat. We pilot it over to the northwest room; the door unseals as we approach. Sitting on an altar in the room beyond is a cube; it looks magic. When we grab it, it shrinks down to a smaller cube, becoming a cube of force.

(https://www.d20srd.org/srd/magicItems/wondrousItems.htm#cubeofForce)

We rearrange the maze and try the southwest room, which also opens for us; inside is a Rod of Lordly Might. Jenny takes the Rod of Lordly Might (https://www.d20srd.org/srd/magicItems/rods.htm#lordlyMight) and we turn the cube of force over to Hatch.

We rearrange the maze to make a path to the entrance, and walk the Apparatus to the entrance, which had sealed behind us. It opens for us, and the apparatus takes us on autopilot through into a sort of terrifying water-slide that eventually dumps us out into the ocean in front of a barnacle-covered statue; there are a couple of pillars behind it, and we've clearly come out of the back end of the temple.

We come past a shipwreck and encounter a dire shark; Durest keeps us on course and Jenny attacks the things with our crab-ship's claws. She's quite successful, and rips into the thing. The shark turns and tries to counter-attack, mostly dulling its teeth on our hull.

There are, of course, two other sharks; and they're all going after us.

Chuck sees a dire shark through the porthole and tries a Shatter spell, creating an underwater sonic attack.

Jenny attacks with the claws again, ripping the shark up some more. Durest notices that the micro-bugs have come out to help repair the Apparatus. "Ne'er though I'd be glad to see those things!" He keeps the ship aimed at the first dire shark.

Chuck tries Shatter again, but this time the shark manages to thrash away and avoid part of the impact. Jenny continues turning the giant shark into sashimi; Durest keeps it oriented. Chuck continues his Shatter spells, damaging his shark again. Jenny kills the first shark, and Durest turns us to face the others. That takes Chuck out of sight, but Jenny does more damage with claws; the sharks try to attack, but prove much less effective this time.

Jenny is *really* enjoying this; this is her favorite kind of puzzle.  Chuck goes out the Cloaca hatch. Jenny kills the second shark, and the last one swings around to try to bite Chuck. This is not going to end well for the dire shark. It chomps down and grabs him in its jaws.

Chuck casts Lightning Bolt.

Durest turns the crab-ship, and Jenny rips it open, freeing Chuck.

The sunken ship had spilled some treasure; 10,000 GP in gold, gems, and art objects. There's also a treasure chest; Chuck floats it over  to the cloaca-port. Hatch checks it over for traps and then opens it; inside we find a Lesser Rod of Metamagic: Enlarge Spell.

We move a little further along and Chuck sticks his head out, then immediately pulls it back in. "Oh no oh no oh no kill it kill it kill it!"

Tentacles slam into the craft. The kraken just tears into us as Durest swings around, slapping the hell out of the craft.

"Ramikin! Keep us facing it!"

Durest heads for the back and swigs a potion of Water Breathing. Chuck reforms and becomes large, and immediately gets eaten. Durest quaffs a potion of swimming and jumps out.

Jenny, meanwhile, is really getting into the mechanical claws. Ramekin has taken over the pilot's chair and is shouting naval gibberish.

Chuck swims into its gullet and attempts to drain energy from the Kraken.

The Kraken smacks Durest with a tentacle and grabs him. Its other tentacle smacks the ship, and tries to bite it.

Durest reaches down and touches the tentacle whilst casting Harm, and... *really* harms the tentacle. It essentially dissolves.

Chuck claws at the inside of the kraken with his vampireness, and inflicts a couple of negative levels on the Kraken (and restores himself in the process). The kraken releases a truly epic cloud of ink and starts  swimming away, taking Chuck with it. Durest swims back into the ship and calls for Ramekin to give chase.

Ramekin sends us forward and catches up with the thing. Chuck drains it again as the chase continues. Ramekin continues accelerating, and rams the kraken from behind.

Chuck is still sucking away the Kraken's life-force; it's still fleeing. We move up on it again, and Jenny reaches out with the claws and rips it open, finally killing it.

Chuck converts the thing to a vampire, and takes control of it; he now has a vampire kraken. We pull out from under the ledge, and into the open ocean. He turns the vampire kraken loose, since it's much slower than the crab-ship; and we head back to the bay and our employers.

Time passes, and we arrive in Welfort in time to find that a human strikeforce has come to try and retake the city from the water. There are three flagships, each with their own Solari. The Lord Hierophant has commandeered a couple of pirate ships, but they're badly outnumbered.