Thursday, June 6, 2024

Terra Povos: The Prison Break

We have – Whisper has – started pulling together a plan. We want to escape the prison *without* leaving a trail of corpses behind us. We’re pretty sure the local guards have keys to their areas, and there are a handful of guards that are dedicated to walking the yard. Whisper studies the guard’s keys and concludes that he should be able to pick those locks, but only with some time undisturbed. 

Sven and a couple of his lieutenants are out of their cells in the evening; they’re the brown-noser. The Gravelers have a dude who’s allowed to carve trinkets by himself in the yard, an activity which involves sharp tools. 

So Whisper’s ask is fo us to not eat or drink anything except the beer for the next two days. And he’s asking Amergin to bring him some truly horrible poop so he can cause a Listeria outbreak. 

Amergin roams the halls, collecting the nastiest poop he can find. He assembles a concoction and lets it ferment for a day or two. The guards blame it on some weird bit of obscure druidry. 

So now he’s got the lovely filth, and he just… swaps it out for Whisper’s bucket. The guard notices, but Amergin bluffs him about his bag being full. Whisper scoops out what he needs, and leaves the rest; and Whisper – using herbs to hide the scent as best he can – smuggles it into the yard. He then attempts to subtly mix it into the cleaning water in a sort of rosemary prison-shit reduction. 

The guards notice that he’s messing with the water, so he attempts to try to distract them by ripping a huge fart and then rubbing a bit of rosemary. They escort him back to his cell, and James manages to convince them that the water is fine for washing dishes. 

Unfortunately, that only take out about five people, and they isolate them in Solitary while they try to recover. We try again: Amergin collects more poop, and determine that Ulf – who helps Solvi – is definitely sick. We start spreading that as a rumor: he shouldn’t be working with Solvi right now. 

So Lithos picks a fight with James, and both of us get dragged to solitary… leaving Whisper to discreetly infect the bucket. 

…And now we have a good outbreak going. Two thirds of the prison – now including Lithos – is completely nauseated. Lithos is blind and he can barely move; what we actually produced here is Blinding Sickness. Lithos sends Vinnie to go talk to Whisper. 

The guards are grossly understaffed, and Whisper – now magically disguised as a guard, courtesy of Vinnie. Guard: "Oy! Jerry! Good to see you looking better!" 

Whisper tugs at his throat and sort of waves at the other guard. Once everyone else is in place, he slips over to the metal door to Solvi’s storeroom and looks at the lock, which looks… tough. 

Amergin, meanwhile, hears the guard outside his door complaining about how he’s feeling so poorly. They chat a bit, and Amergin heads out to do his work shift… pausing only to try to clock the guard and toss him in Amergin’s former cell. Guard: "What the fuck are ye doin’?"

Amergin: "I’m tryin’ tae help ye!" He hits the guard. The guard hits him back, but the guard is a monk and hits back really, really hard. They go another round or so, but the monk subdues him and drags him back into his cell. 

Whisper races over to the special holding cells. Monster and Thrain both sound okay. He starts on Monster’s door. "Oh, you open door! I never come out. It’s because I’m dangerous. I should probably stay." 

Whisper guides him out the door. He just follows Whisper along to Thrain’s cell. "Oh, no. He bad man. We shouldn’t let him out. You think we should let him out? We shouldn’t let him out." Whisper manages to convince him. He pops the lock on Thrain’s door. Whisper smiles at him, pushes the door wide open, and walks away. Thrain gets up, walks to the door, looks around… starts trying to open the door to the wizards’ area. He runs down the hall, finds another locked door and starts banging on it.

Whisper and Monster head down the other way, towards the divine casters’ wing. Thrain is making a commotion behind them. Thrain eventually busts the door down and charges past the guard towards the next door. Thrain throws him off and smashes a door. 

Lithos, fortunately, is in Solitary. 

The guard greets Whisper as Jerry, and after a few moments he looks back, pretends to see Monster, and books it over to the other side of the room. There’s a brief exchange of blows, and the guard is winning. 

Whisper finds Amergin, who is completely unconscious. Vinnie: "Zombie?"

He opens another door and releases the Priestess of Appolyon, who charges out and starts adding to the chaos. He releases the mute druid as well, then goes back and picks up Amergin. Vinnie offers to grant him Telekinesis, but he goes for Shocking Grasp instead and they manage to take the guard down. Monster: "He hurt me!" He starts crying. Darexis the priestess interprets what Whisper wants and agrees to start a riot. 

They take the keys off the guard, and head off to open the storeroom where the levers apparently are. There are still screams and cries in the magic users’ wing. He drops the Symbol of Sleep on the Solitary door and bangs on it while Darexis yells for help. 

Baldy, meanwhile, is distracting the guard in his area with made-up information about something that’s about to happen. The guard is so completely distracted that he comes into in the cell and falls asleep. Baldy sneaks out, pilfering the guard’s keys on the way. He locks the guard in the cell. He starts unlocking the cells for the Nomads and the Gravelers, leaving the guard safely locked in his own cell. He’s busily inspiring them – "FREEDOM!" – and they come surging out. 

Meanwhile, in the main room, Thrain the berserked and Rometta Blackblood the cannibal necromancer come surging out of the wizards’ holding area. At this point Baldy shows up with the rebellion, and that’s enough noise to draw out the remaining guards and the warden. There’s a wizard, a couple of guys who are actually armed, and warden Hammer M’Hole. There’s a guy with a masterwork greatsword and a couple of guys in plate armor with axes and shields. Quick assessment: they’re going to go right through the rioters like a scythe through wheat, 

We immediately have Vinnie shrink the guards to half their size. We then create a net and let it drop on the shrunken guards. 

The warden’s keyring has more keys than everybody else. The wizard tries to escape the net and fails. Whisper sneaks over to the side of the guards. Whisper motions to Vinnie and makes the Time Out gesture. Vinnie drops a Time Stop on him. Whisper takes the warden’s keys, heads to the first door, unlocks it, and heads down to the next door. Amergin calls for Telekinesis. 

Then he closes the door behind Whisper and slams the guards against the ceiling. Whisper opens the door to the storeroom, which has the gear for the mages and priests, some mundane weapons, and stairs down to the tunnels. He finds a secret door as well, and beyond it is a room with four levers: Sleep, Gas, Doors, and one in a glass box with a hammer, which is presumably Death. 

He pulls the one labeled Doors.  

A bunch of stone doors drop down. The warden yells: "They’ve gone to the panic room!"

Archibald: "Lay down and surrender or everybody dies!" 

The guards start cutting their way loose. 

Prisoners: "What do you mean we’re going to die?" 

Whisper pulls Sleep. 

Sleep gas fills most of the prison. Vinnie leans over to Lithos and starts trying to resuscitate Lithos with skull to mouth. The small goblin wizard tastes the funk of forty thousand years. This is the real magic mouth, right here, and Lithos learns a new spell on the spot: Lithos' Telekinetic Tongue.

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