Friday, May 4, 2012

Patterns in SPAM

So I'm looking through my SPAM folder, and I start to notice some disturbing patterns.

Dr. Max Member is offering to, um, "enhance my manhood". Presumably, once I've done that, I can go on to the next email:

Canadian Pharmacy is offering my THE BEST PRICES on Cialis and Viagra. With my newly-enlarged anatomy and low-price chemical performance-enhancers, I'm now prepared for the next step:

Sexy Adriana wants to know if I'm there, and if I'll please come online. (It's so nice to be wanted!) So presumably, with all my preparation in place, I can hook up with Sexy Adriana. Which will lead, inevitably, to the last email in my SPAM folder:

Get her flowers for Mother's Day.

...

...

...I wish I was making that up. But, no, that was really what my SPAM folder looked like this morning.

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