Monday, December 6, 2010

Introducing Our New Mascot

I've decided that this blog needs a mascot. After long nights of thinking over what sort of animal would best represent the sort of discussion that goes on here, and further of weeks of experimentation in my secret laboratory, I am pleased to present...

Cuddles the Zombie Velociraptor
Art by Billy Browning

Cuddles is, of course, a prototype. I hope to have an entire army of zombie velociraptors ready in time for the next election. They also may be employed more discreetly: against people who tell you to smile when you're in a bad mood, people who can't manage to park their cartoonishly oversized vehicles, and anyone who's rude to legal secretaries or college professors.

At present, Cuddles lives... er, "dwells"... in a large artificial cavern off the southern end of the crypto-zoo beneath my lab. He shares this space with Dropgator (a genetically engineered crossbreeding of an alligator and a drop bear) and Deathscratch the Cybernetic Sloth.

On a completely[1] unrelated note, the position of crypto-zookeeper has opened up again, and none of my current minions will risk having their heads eaten feel qualified to take over. If you're interested in applying for the job, please feel free to post your resume in the comments.

[1] No, really, I promise, there's no connection at all. Hey, would an evil genius lie to you?

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Feel free to leave comments; it lets me know that people are actually reading my blog. Interesting tangents and topic drift just add flavor. Linking to your own stuff is fine, as long as it's at least loosely relevant. Be civil, and have fun!