Tuesday, July 31, 2012

An Epicish Battle

I had a battle with Firstborn last night, and it was truly the stuff of legends.

My Hero Factory guy (who, despite the name, was actually a villain) has four legs, wings, a gun hand, and a long tail with more guns on it. However, being an evil mastermind, he didn't immediately leap into battle. Instead, he sent his minions against Firstborn's Hero Factory guy.

And let me tell you, my villain had some of the best minions ever. He recruited three Green Lanterns, a Ben Ten alien, two Transformers, a giant stuffed parrot, a small rubber scorpion, and... {drumroll} a ninjedi! (That's a ninja with Jedi training and a lightsaber. I know, right?) It seemed there was no way he could lose, since Firstborn's guy had only a single robotic dog that, well, barked very loudly.

Unfortunately, Firstborn's Hero Factory guy is functionally invincible. (Firstborn loves to battle, but he hates to lose. So he plays in God Mode, even when it's not a computer game and that setting isn't supposed to be available.) So despite valiant assaults from all these minions -- oh, and having a pillow-boulder dropped on his head -- he not only survived, but finally decapitated my Hero Factory guy.

Standing triumphant amidst the scattered bodies of his fallen foes, Firstborn's Hero Factory guy spoke boldly of the brave new world to come: "Come on, Daddy. We're not done battling yet."

Tragically, not only was Daddy's Hero Factory guy missing his head, it was also time to turn out the lights and go to bed. The Final Battle... would have to wait.


  1. Having recently played Clive Barker's Jericho, and not fully grokking that you were referring to *your* Firstborn, my jaw dropped in the sheer cosmic awesomeness of this.

    The reality makes it no less awesome. ^_^


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