It's like some sort of hellish plot

You ever have one of those weeks where you're really trying to slow down and just... get enough sleep... and everything conspires against you? Yeah. 

So Monday night I went to bed at a fairly reasonable time -- around 11:00. The boys had a teacher in-service day, but I had a regular workday. Or, well, I was supposed to have a regular workday. I woke up, weirdly, at about 3:30 in the morning instead, and managed to lie still in bed until about 4:00, when I realized that no, I wasn't going back to sleep. 

So I went to the kitchen and discovered that Secondborn was also awake, having apparently had some sort of nightmare; that was probably what woke me up. So I left him in his room, and I sat in the living and read until about 7:00, when it was time to shower and go to work, and... that was pretty much when it hit me. I called it in as a last-minute vacation day, collapsed on the couch, and slept until 3:30 in the afternoon. So much for Tuesday. 

Yesterday was Wednesday. I went to bed fairly early on Tuesday -- again, around 11:00 -- and was awakened at like four in the morning by my wife, whose allergies were acting up. The results of her being stuffy would have put a chainsaw to shame. I was in the middle of a dream where the high-schoolers were asking me to check the upstairs room at my old house to make sure it was ready for voting (I guess because 2020, y'all) and in the dream I'd just flipped on the lights up there when this enormous snoring sound came roaring up from behind me; that was Beautiful Wife, out in the Real World. So... yeah. Not the best sleep I've ever gotten. 

So last night I took a Benadryl and went down just a little after 10:00. Beautiful Wife decides to sleep on the couch in case she starts snoring again. Unfortunately... she left her phone on her desk, which is directly under the bed. And the phone is set to BLEEP if some asshole decides to post a discussion topic on Blackboard at (hypothetically) 1:30 in damned morning. And it BLEEPs quote a lot if that same asshole is posting a week or two's worth of topics. 

So, yeah: wide awake until about 3:00. Read, ate some chips, and eventually just brushed my teeth and crawled in again because I knew when my alarm was going to go off. It was probably about six and half hours of sleep total, which wouldn't be too bad -- except for the part where it was broken up into two three-hour chunks. 

::sigh::

It really does seem like the harder I try to get rested, the more things leap out to trip me up.