Inspired by something I saw on facebook...
"If you do not have enough olive oil, turn to page 122. Um, okay. Page 122... 'Order Pizza.'"
"WHAT?"
"That's what it says. We're out of Olive Oil, so I turned to page 122, and it's telling me to order pizza."
"Are there any other options?"
"Hang on, I marked our place with my finger... Okay. 'If you think you can run to the store to get more olive oil before your guests arrive, turn to page 76.'"
"And?"
"Hang on. Page 76... 'You will not have time to finish the sauce before the chicken is overcooked to the point of petrification. Turn to page 122."
"And what's on page 122?"
"It still says, 'Order pizza.'"
"What if I substitute melted butter for the olive oil?"
"Well, let me flip back... Here it is. 'If you wish to substitute butter for olive oil under the wildly misguided belief that this won't thoroughly destroy the flavor of your sauce, turn to page 130."
"Fine. Page 130?"
"...Says, 'May all the saints and angels protect you. You're on your own from here. Godspeed.' Then, in parentheses, it adds: 'It's still not too late to turn to page 122.' Which is the pizza page. I... may be detecting a theme, here."
I used to love those books.
ReplyDeleteI did, too. I keep meaning to write one -- it would be so easy to do it in html.
ReplyDelete