Frazzled

I didn't take any vacation time off around Christmas or New Year's Day, which means that I had three days of mid-week vacation and my sense of time is absolutely scrambled; I spent half the Friday after New Year's think it was Monday, then went to Dad's Wife's house to celebrate my nephew's birthday. It went well, I think, but we're due to go inter my dad's ashes in two weeks and so that just hit me. Plus, a friend -- the father of Secondborn's closest friend -- is back in the hospital, so there's that. (He's been dying by inches for about three years now, but it looks like we're down to the final month or two; or maybe that's weeks.) Oh, and add to that the moral injury of "We're invading Venezuela under the transparent pretext of overthrowing a dictator so that we can grab their oil" along with, well, everything else the Republicans are doing and the Democrats are too busy being helpless to effectively oppose, and I'm just... tired, even after a solid night's sleep. 

Planning would be a whole lot easier if I weren't busy disassociating, basically. 

I have two writing projects that are... both coming along at their own speed, I think. One of them might be publishable when it's finished; the other one... I guess technically I could publish it, but I feel like I'd owe an apology to anyone who actually bought it. (Not because it's self-indulgent and the main character is a huge Mary Sue -- though both those things are true -- but because it's sloppy and I lack the dedication to go back and clean it up.) I'm okay with that; I'm writing them more for my own sanity than for any sort of readership or income stream. I've been replaying The Outer Worlds, which is... a good game, if not a great one, and fits neatly with the mood of the primary (publishable) writing project. 

The cat spent a portion of Friday night climbing around on top of the shelves in our bedroom, and didn't even have the grace to look guilty when I located him. Which was actually pretty cute; kitten is going to kitten, after all. The dog is keeping me company on the back couch while I'm writing this, and  I've still got most of Saturday and Sunday to recuperate -- even if this post won't go up until Monday. 

I am not looking forward to Monday. I expect work is going to be crazy-busy, and I've got to put a request for vacation time in for Dad's interment, and after all the work on the upgrades and whatnot I've just kind of bottomed out. Still love the new job, and I really like the people I'm working with, though. Even with the commute, it's a huge improvement. But yeah, I should have taken Friday off and just let myself crash out to get ready for this. 

It's a rough time for everybody right now, I think. Take care of yourselves, Gentle Readers, and do whatever you can to take care of each other.