Infinite Skillz:
Okay, true story: at the send-off lunch yesterday, I stood up to give a speech. I'd thought about this in advance, and I intended to keep it short and sweet. I was just going to say, "It's been a pleasure working with all of you. I hope your time at the city has been better for my time at the city." Emphasis on for, as in because of.
I had not reckoned with the presence of loud-ish Mexican music in the background and possibly the secret expectations of my co-workers, because apparently what everybody at the table -- including my own dear wife, who was sitting right beside me -- what everybody heard was this:
"I hope your time at the city is better than my time at the city."
And you know what? Fuck it. I'm not even going to try to correct it. First off, nobody would believe me. Second, even if it's the exact opposite of what I meant to say, it's not entirely untrue and maybe people needed to hear it. But mainly, I'm not going to try to correct it because it's the single most objectively funny Freudian slip I have ever made in my life.
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