Wednesday, March 7, 2012

The first step is admitting you have a problem...

Hi. My name is Michael Mock, and I... am an addict.

It started small. Just a cup or so in the morning... you know, to warm me up a little. But pretty soon it was more than just one cup. The cups started getting bigger, too. And now... well, some days it seems like I just can't get going without it.

I told myself it was fine. I told myself I could quit any time. I... might have been wrong about it.

But, y'know...? It's not interfering with work. It's not interfering with my family life. Heck, my wife and children actively enable the habit. And I'm just not sure I'm ready to give it up. Oh, sure, maybe I'm a "functional addict," but right now I can live with that.

Plus, the stuff is full of antioxidants... and the way I drink it, it gets a little extra calcium into my system, too. That's healthy, right?

So... I'm sorry folks, but I'm just not ready to for that second step. If this is madness, I don't want to be restored to sanity. I'm just... I'm just not ready to give up my tea.

* * *

The other day, author Martha Wells observed that every time someone mentioned tea on Twitter, she gets a craving for tea. I tweeted back to point out that I get around this problem by making sure that I keep a massive mug of tea nearby at all times. This is true, but I don't think it really captures just how massive a mug I'm talking about.

So, to assist and enlighten you all, I've prepared a quick visual of my tea cup:
That's right, if your mug won't double as a life raft in an emergency, it's just not big enough. (Incidentally, while I did run that picture through Photoshop to put in the word balloon, I didn't mess with the sizes of the objects at all. The mug is seven inches tall and four inches across. You can get thoroughly sloshed just thinking about how much beer it would hold...)

9 comments:

  1. I am a fellow addict, and happily so!

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  2. My addiction is caffeine, and I found out that I need it in coffee form in the morning because on Monday I tried sticking with the Diet Coke and man, let me tell you, that is a mistake I will not repeat. Oy, my head...

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  3. I drink tea mainly because the steam makes my sinuses feel better. I have a lot of allergy problems.

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  4. Mug envy!

    Tea is great!

    http://www.snopes.com/quotes/graphics/tea.gif

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  5. Tea in a mug?

    Where I come from tea only comes in a nice tall glass with ice and sugar and lemon.

    I don't know what this hot tea that you speak of is.

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  6. Hot tea needs to be drunk from tiny cups. This seems anti-intuitive, but it's key to keeping your tea hot and fresh. So I have a 2L electric water heater and a tiny mug on hand. Cold tea is fine, but room temp tea is meh (and develops that weird iridescent oil slick on top, which can't be good for you). Besides, that way you can customize every cup: brown sugar, honey, lemon, milk, green tea, black tea, cheap tea, really cheap tea, ginger shavings instead of tea, etc.

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  7. Oh, so much mug envy! I am too lazy to do the small cups of tea like Dav recommends, so I'm always on the lookout for bigger & better mugs.

    No caffeine though, if I can get away with it. That stuff fucks up my system. So it's decaf or herbal tisanes for me. It's probably sacrilege, but if I could get decaffeinated genmai-cha, I would die happy.

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  8. I'm half Italian, half Japanese; many mornings I've awoken to my father lecturing my espresso-sipping mother on the virtues of tea. "It's less caffeine!" No, Dad - not when you're sipping tea like, twice an hour.

    I prefer the best of both worlds: steamed tea lattes. Starbucks in Japan makes them with matcha - powdered green tea. They're just as strong as espresso, if not, more-so.

    @Nenya: decaf genmaicha exists; it's not sacrilege because genmaicha isn't used in Japanese tea ceremonies.

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  9. I might be able to get through a morning with only three of those . . .

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