I can see why he does this. It's exciting, the idea of putting one over on people. But it's also freeing. It gives him a place to say all the things he can't say in real life. He always seems so much more relaxed after he writes one of these reflections.
I'm "Claire", of course. I'm the one who's been keeping him alive all this time. The snakes under the bed, the traps left outside our front door, all the viewings and the sending that he never even knew I fended off. I mean, I didn't know enough to stop the other attacks - the ones that happened outside the apartment - but I worked to keep him breathing. Isn't that what girlfriends are supposed to do?
Okay, I'm kidding about keeping him alive. But now that I've put that in there, he'll have to wonder - so I think I'll leave it in. It'll give him something to think over.
And reading through this has given me a lot to think over. I mean, now I know how he found out about me. I'd warn my friends, but... I just took a vow not to do exactly that. That could still become a problem, but I hope not. At least he didn't kill any of them. Once he knew who they were, I don't see how they could have stopped him.
Especially once he discovered what we can do.
By we, I mean "he and I," of course. I don't know of anyone else who can use that strange, misty abstraction of a world in order to travel. It was kind of a relief to find out that he and his people didn't know any more about it than my people did. Scary, in another way, but still kind of a relief.
I should tell them about it. I haven't, but I should. The vow I took when we finally came home wouldn't prevent it - it only forbids me to give away any of their secrets, and this is something that he and I discovered together. But I'm afraid. Even after a month of traveling that way to escape the Whisperers, I don't like that world. I don't trust it. I'd rather go back to just not using it, only I don't think we can - not in the long run. Too many of his people know about it.
One of my friends is due to visit next week. I think I'll mention it to her, and let her pass it along. I've given my family enough to be worried about already. This is too big to hold out on.
And that's probably enough for now. I think I'll hack into that blog where he likes to drop these things, and drop this in with his posts. It'll be just my luck that he never even notices...
Oh, yeah... almost forgot. Reflections of a Deranged Cultist is a work of fiction, and there really aren't any non-human or part-human people living in the U.S.A. and worshiping strange, otherworldly Things - promise.
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