Scammer Seeks Apprentice

I saw a sign on my way into work this morning. I'd just gotten off the highway, and was coming up to the light where I turn from the service road onto Arapaho. The sign was on the verge - that grassy area between the sidewalk and the street. The sign was maybe two feet wide and a foot high, held up by an abbreviated wire frame that had been driven into the earth. It was hand-lettered, and it said:

REAL ESTATE INVESTOR
SEEKS APPRENTICE
$20,000 / MONTH+?
(972) XXX-XXXX

Now, my immediate reaction was a derisive snort. These sorts of signs pop up from time to time, and they're invarably scams of one sort or another. But the more I thought about this one, the funnier it got.

I mean... "Real estate investor seeks apprentice?" Seriously? Have you looked at the market lately? D/FW isn't as bad off as some areas, but it ain't great - and somehow you're doing well enough to seek an apprentice?

And that brings me to my second point: "apprentice?" How does that work? I mean, if you're looking for an assistant, that's one thing - though I notice that there's no particular skill set being mentioned. Instead, I'm supposed to believe that you're seeking a protégé that you can train in the mysterious ways of real estate investing, someone to whom you can impart your hidden wisdom, someone who - when the time comes - can take up the burden himself...? Dude, I think you've confused "real estate investing" with "Jedi training".

Which brings us, at last, to the utterly laughable bottom line: $20,000 / month. Seriously, what? You can afford to pay an apprentice $20K a month, but you have to advertise with craptastic hand-lettered signs by the roadside? Really? Or maybe I'm reading that wrong, and you want me to pay you $20K each month for the priviledge of sitting at your feet and learning all the skills that made you - clearly - so enviably successful. Either way, FAIL.

So very much fail, on so very many levels.