Welcome to the Island of Sodor, boys and girls. Nice place, isn't it? Really lovely. I'm Diesel, by the way. Pleased to meet you.
I know, I know. You don't want me. You want Thomas. Story of my life, kids. And you don't like me at all. You all think I'm the mean one. I'm the one who's always causing trouble for the Thomas and rest of the steamies. Let me tell you, kids, you don't know how it is. None of you have any idea what it's like around here.
Thomas? Thomas doesn't see it. He doesn't have to. Why should he worry? He's the Fat Controller's favorite. What? Oh, right, you're Americans - you call him Sir Topham Hatt. Well, around here he's the Fat Controller, the terror of every train that works his railway.
Oh, sure, he likes to look good in public. Presents himself as stern but fair, maybe a little gruff, but working hard to make sure everything gets done on time. It's all propaganda, boys and girls. He hired a PR firm about five years back, to promote the island and manage his public image, and that was the best they could do with him.
You want to know why I spend so much time trying to make the other engines look bad? Why I keep doing things to prove that I'm better and more useful? Why I try to get the others in trouble?
It's because I have to. It's the only way to be safe.
You have to understand, the Fat Controller runs this island. Nothing happens here unless he allows it. The Mayor? Just a figurehead. So are all the rest. Even the Vicar is in the Fat Controller's pocket. And if you don't go along with the Fat Controller's program, well... he makes sure there are consequences. Do you know that he once had a steamy bricked up in a tunnel?
For an engine, that's some serious Cask of Amontillado-type nightmare fuel. And that's not the worst of it. Nobody talks about what happens when you aren't a Really Useful Engine anymore, but we all know. If you're not Really Useful, you're scrap. If you can't be repaired, it's the Smelter's Yard for you.
So I'll do whatever it takes to make sure the Fat Controller knows just how Really Useful I am, how much better than all the other engines. I have to.
It's the only security I have.