What do you mean, "what's wrong?" Why would you assume that the only reason I'd be calling you is that something's... Oh. I do? Yes, I suppose I do. Very well, I'll tell you what's wrong: our son is getting taller.
He does that anyway, so I might not have caught on for quite a while if he hadn't given himself away. And let me tell you, a three hundred pound Retriever puppy is a dead giveaway. But in any case, he's been using my growth ray on himself. And that is why, in the face of our genetics, this year he's one of the biggest kids in his class.
No, of course I can't "just fix it". If I could, I wouldn't be calling you about it. No, calm down - it's not a technical problem. You don't think I'd build a growth ray without designing a shrink ray as well, do you? Well, I didn't. I have a shrink ray. I can bring him back to his original size.
I'm calling you because I don't know what his original size is. How big should he be? No, of course I don't keep track of things like that. You're his mother; don't you...?
I see. All right, very well, I'll pull up some charts and see if I can't make a decent statistical estimate.
What? Oh. No, I don't believe so. He said a couple of the kids were giving him trouble about being so small, but after that incident with his science project I don't think any of them are actually bullying him. It's just something he's sensitive about.
Well, I suppose I could, though we might have to make some adjustments later, so he doesn't end up as an eight-foot-tall adult. Or some childhood equivalent that his teachers might notice. Let me pull some data together, and I'll find him a size that's large, but not too large. And then I'll set some security on the growth ray.
Yes, I'll be careful. All right, you too.