So we've driven to Houston for a wedding this weekend. (One of my wife's cousins is getting married.) We got in Friday night, and attended the rehearsal dinner. Then we came home and slept.
Despite getting quite a bit of sleep, I found myself completely worn out after lunch today. So I went into one of the rooms where we're staying, stretched out on the bed, and napped. And somewhere in there, the Beautiful Wife brought Secondborn in and put him in his pack'n'play for his nap. Secondborn hates napping, so naturally he screamed, a lot. And after a while he quit screaming, so I assumed that he was napping, too. (I wasn't actually in a position to check, as that would have required opening my eyes, and possibly rolling over.)
A while after that, the Beautiful Wife opened the door again and said, "I need you to move to another bed. I have to put Secondborn down for his nap."
I cracked an eyelid and said, "He's not in here?"
She said: "You didn't take him out?"
It turns out that Secondborn had, well, escaped. Not only had he gotten out of his pack'n'play, but he'd gone out into the main area and closed the door behind himself to cover his trail. So my wife thought that I'd taken the screaming child, plopped him outside the room for them to deal with, and gone back to sleep. I thought he'd quieted down because he was asleep.
And sure enough, when we put him back in the pack'n'play and asked him to show us how he could climb out, he did. He swung a leg up and hooked his ankle over the top of the wall. Then he used that to lever himself up until he was on top, and then he lowered himself back down on the outside.
Life as we know it is essentially over.